Return of the Internal Addict

It is a common misconception that after a certain period of time without smoking, the urge to smoke disappears. One would think that after spending almost three months without smoking, or using Nicotine replacement products, one’s urge to smoke would be gone. When I stopped smoking by going cold turkey, I was sure that after the first months, I would not want to smoke anymore. Now I know that I was mistaken.

As I wrote almost a month ago, the previous attack of my internal addict brought back memories of my old mistakes. This time, my internal addict has selected a bit more subtle approach. Instead of trying to break me by bringing back agonizing memories, my internal addict is reminding me about the fun I used to have, when I was still smoking. This is indeed a brilliant strategy, because it does not activate my defenses immediately. It takes some time for me to realize, what is really going on. My internal addict uses this time, and tries to convince me that I can still have fun again. All I need to do is to light that first cigarette.

Saying no to this urge might seem like an easy task for a person, who has spent 84 days without smoking. However, I have noticed that it is not an easy task. The problem is that resisting an urge created by positive memories is not so straight forward than resisting an urge, which was raised by negative thoughts. The latter can be resisted by understanding that smoking will not improve the situation at all. Defeating an urge created by positive memories requires a different approach.

It is important to realize that smoking has got nothing to do with the fact that you are having those memories. Smoking might be included in your memories, but only because you were smoking at the time. The link between smoking and having a good time is an illusion, which is created to lure you back in to the trap.

At first, it was hard for me to realize this, but after a while I noticed a pattern in my memories. Every good memory of mine, which associated having a good time with smoking, started with a memory of a pleasant situation. After this, a thought reminding me that I was smoking at the time, was born. Even in my mind, a memory of having fun, and a thought of smoking, were not united. This realization helped me to unveil the disguise of my internal addict, and gave me the motivation needed to deal with him.

I have to admit that I was surprised to face this situation, but it has also helped me to understand better, why so many people fail to stop smoking. Usually people tend to explain that their urge to smoke was too much for them. It is true that the internal addict is a devious enemy. However, most of the people, who are trying to stop smoking, are their own worst enemies.

They have forgotten that starting smoking was easy. All they had to do was to smoke. Stopping smoking is hard, because dealing with physical withdrawal symptoms is not enough. If the psychological withdrawal symptoms are disregarded, it is likely that the person in question will feel that stopping smoking is impossible. It will still be hard, but understanding the reasons behind one’s urges will increase one’s motivation to deal with them.

And when one is facing a task like this, motivation is everything. It is the difference between success and failure.